The Listening Side of the Wall
Friends S10:E1 - Y’all. Can you believe it? We are finally here. We have arrived at the beginning of the tenth leg of our ten leg journey together. When we set out down this road on that Monday night in late-September 2014, I remember a young, ambitious Kenneth Bryan Adams (past me <yes, my middle name is Bryan…leave me alone>) posting the first entry calling OUR shot then immediately trying to conceptualize the challenge he had put forth for himself (writing 236 blog posts, one on the 20-year anniversary of the first airing of each episode of Friends) and thinking, “Well, that seems a little daunting. Am I crazy? What have I just done?” In retrospect, it was an appropriate but drastically understated reaction. That young whippersnapper had no idea what he was getting US into. As god is my witness, (past me) Kenny boy, you really screwed us six ways to Sunday on this one. Did you have any idea what you were committing us to or even pause for one second that infamous night to consider the ramifications of what signing US up for decade of unnecessary strict deadlines would have on OUR personal life? I can’t tell you the number of Sunday afternoons I lived through these last nine years where the anxiety starts creeping in that another Friends 20/20 blog post is due tomorrow like clockwork around 1pm and so maybe I should interrupt my weekend leisure time and start working on it so I don’t have to spend Monday stressed out about frantically trying to meet my deadline. (Past me) Kenny, you ignorant fool, you needlessly but quite officially ruined “Sunday Funday” for US for an entire tenth of a century. Nice going…I hope you’re proud of ourself.
Of course, you (the readers) might ask why I didn’t at some point just distance myself from young Kenny’s foolishness, retract his Friends 20/20 commitment, and move on with enjoying my Sundays and posting content to the site whenever I damn well please by eliminating his self-imposed deadlines from my work. Well, loyal readers, I have my reasons. They are threefold. 1) Ted James (my editor) loved the concept for the blog series as soon as young Kenny posted the first entry and I’m sure if you don’t know, you can certainly imagine how annoying editors can be once they’ve got their hooks in a project. Editors are a rare form of pestering, petty, pitiful human. (Don’t worry, there is very little chance Mr. James is actually going to read this but you can bet your bottom dollar that the first thing he will do tomorrow morning is log into the site and make sure it was posted on time.) 2) Honestly, reaching this milestone of the tenth leg of this ten leg race is a testament to my exorbitant personal hubris more than anything else. Snot-nosed (past me) Kenny had no idea what he was doing when he called OUR shot but it was indeed OUR shot he was calling and ergo I was not going to ever concede that it was too hard or admit that I couldn’t summon the inner fortitude to meet the challenge. When I put my mind to something, I always follow through. 3) Most importantly, though, I didn’t want to let you (the loyal readers) down. Hey you. I really appreciate all of your support. I love commiserating with you on our shared love of Friends and I’m tickled to death that you find my writing entertaining enough to keep coming back week after week. In other words, (Everything I Do) I Do It For You. (You get one. That’s the only one you get.) On that note, saddle up. By hook or crook, here we are barreling ahead into the last leg of the race. Let’s sprint through the tape but also, let’s make our remaining time together count. Among other things, we’ve got a juicy “Joey & Rachel” plot development to discuss. Let’s dive into this week’s episode already. Shall we?
Well, for starters, you can put me firmly in the “I am not feeling this Joey & Rachel romantic storyline” camp. It felt contrived, forced, unnatural, etc. etc. The writers were obviously swinging for the fences with the Season 9 finale ending with Joey and Rachel kissing but it was a huge swing and a miss for the third out down three with the bases loaded for me. Of course, I’m sure that was the case for most Friends fans who were already hopelessly invested in having Ross and Rachel end up together. I know the writers knew this about the show’s fanbase and were merely setting up another in the long line of obstacles in the way of an inevitable R&R redemption climax but using Joey as one of those obstacles just landed for me as lazy attempt at shock value in closing out Season 9 and it consequently resulted in us starting the tenth and final season with an arch that let’s face it felt closer to incestuous than exciting or endearing. On that note, moving on… Chandler was on a role with zingers during today’s episode, a lot of them field by his hilarious disdain for Monica’s seashell braids. It’s going to be exceptionally hard to choose a winner of the Chan Man Quip of the Week today but that’s the beauty of episodes in which Chandler M. Bing is on this much of a heater: we’ve got plenty to choose from and when that’s the case, we can’t go wrong. (Side note: at least my middle name isn’t Muriel.) Finally, I was really tickled with how Phoebe handled the whole Precious situation. That was a moment of pure comedy gold. On that note, it’s good to be back but it’s even better to be so close to being gone. Since I know you don’t ever want to see me go, I’m very sorry about that and I wish you the best of luck in all your endeavors (including reading the following recap).
Recap in the Key of Phoebe - This is the one where Joey and Rachel try to figure out how to tell Ross about their kiss so they can keep kissing, Ross actually does tell Joey about his kiss with Charlie and is relieved when Joey tells him it’s okay so he and Charlie can keep kissing and in return he tells Joey that he might edge out Chandler, Mike tells Phoebe he’s been kissing Precious while they’ve been broken up, Phoebe tells Precious that her and Mike will no longer be kissing, Chandler is repulsed by the idea of kissing Allen Iverson, and Monica French kisses mouthful of her own hair when she is too loud on the listening side of the wall.
Gandalf Gaffes - None. Flawless episode!
Chan Man Quip of the Week - [The Setup] Phoebe is in Monica and Chandler’s hotel room in Barbados monitoring the activity in the adjoining rooms on both sides after they have discovered that Ross is hooking up with Charlie on one side and Joey is hooking up with Rachel on the other side from the noise permeating through the unusually thin walls. As they are listening intently, Chandler asks the others, “Anything?” Monica, monitoring the Joey and Charlie wall, responds, “I think I hear curtains closing” and then Phoebe, monitoring the Joey and Rachel wall, exuberantly adds, “We’ve got shoes being kicked off over here.” Monica reports back again, “Bedspring, unmistakeable!” At this point Chandler interjects somewhat disgustedly, “You do realize that’s your brother?” Monica admits, “Not until you just said it” and demands, “somebody switch!” Phoebe obliges and goes over to the Ross and Charlie wall so Monica can stop listening to her brother’s romantic encounter by scurrying over to the Joey and Rachel wall. When Monica gets to the other wall, she looks at Chandler as it dawns on her, “Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people leaving with the same person we came with.” [The Knockout] Still completely turned off by the volume and frizziness of Monica’s hair in the Barbados humidity, Chandler fires back, “That's not true. I came with Monica and I'm leaving with Weird Al."
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