theLeftAhead

Friends S4:E17 – Knock, knock. Who’s there? PORN!. What’s happening, Mercedes Friends? The strangest thing happened to me last week. I went to bed last Sunday night and the next thing I remember, I was waking up and it was Tuesday morning. I panicked, thinking I had slept for over 24 hours straight and had missed the deadline for Friends S4:E16. (And you can imagine how awful I felt about…

Friends S4:E16 – [Begin Transmission] [Alien Voice] Greetings, Earth Friendlies. This is Zooperkroll, Supreme Leader of the Infini. My species is from the planet Visonia. Visonia is located 37 trillion miles away from Earth in the Milky Way’s Norf system. I am writing to inform you that we have abducted your Friends 20/20 blogger, Ken Adams, and are currently conducting experiments on him in outer space. Because of this prior…

Friends S4:E15 – Howdy, FRIENDS NATION. How is everyone feeling this fine Monday evening? To put it another way… what’s good with it? A lot has happened since our last convening. Sadly, right in the middle of our break (and on Valentine’s Day, of all days) there was another school shooting. My heart goes out the families and friends of the victims. That being said, it is maddening to me…

Friends S4:E14 – What is good, Friendsters? Philly friends, how you living today? What’s that? Oh snap. E-A-G-L-E-S Eagles! Fly Eagles fly! Woot woot! Yas, yas, YAS. Congratulations are in order to all of my Philly peeps out there in Friends 20/20 land. It’s been a long time coming. You really, really deserve this…so enjoy it. I’d say do it big just don’t tear down your own city but checking…

Friends S4:E13 – You say you want a piece of me? Well Baby, take a big bite.. Oh, hey. Sorry, I didn’t see you come in, girls and boys. I was, umm…yeah. I was just singing a little Pantera which is kind of weird because I don’t really listen to Pantera. (It’s almost as if I have an ulterior motive for singing 80’s glam medal ?) Anywho…how’s it going this…

Friends S4:E12 – Happy and hopeful MLK Day, Friendinistas! I hope Week 52 of The Resistance finds you well. While it’s been a tough year in many ways, our efforts to speak truth to power have yielded some incredible victories and our defense of democracy in the face of the onslaught against it has held true so far. I often joke in this column about only working one day a…

Friends S4:E11 – Happy New Year, Mercedes Friends! I hope 2018 has been good to you all thus far. I can’t believe we’re already eight days into our fifth calendar year together. This first week of the twentieth anniversary of 1998 flew by. On the other hand, I can’t believe that we’re only eight days into 2018 and I’m already back to work. It kind of feels like we got…

Friends S4:E10 – ‘Tis the season, Budolph the Friend-nosed Reindeers! How is everyone doing this fine December Monday? If you haven’t noticed, I’m in quite the festive mood. Not only ’tis it the season, ’tis also our last convening in the Year Of Our Lord 2017. And what a crazy, whirlwind year it’s been. We’ve organized a Friendinistas resistance to the presidency of Donald J. Trump, fought our way through…

Friends S4:E9 – “Okay, Chandler. See you tomorrow.” Mike hung up the phone and headed from his courtside seat into the United Center tunnel thinking to himself, “What a dominating win by my Bulls over our arch-rival Knicks. Isn’t it ironic (don’t you think) that I have an early morning flight to New York tomorrow to party with my college bros. After all, they are Knicks fans. I’ll have to…

Friends S4:E8 – Happy Thanksgiving Eve Eve Eve, girls and boys. Everybody settle down. I know we’re all anxious to get on to our holiday weekend and our two-week break from class, but we’ve got some important business to attend to prior to shifting into turkey-mode. As you all know, I have your Halloween “Which FRIEND R U?” video assignments graded and (drum roll please) every single last one of…

Friends S4:E7 – What? Does? It? Do, Friendsters? I hope everybody has had a great couple of weeks. As you likely noticed last week, I decided to devote this section of Hard-ass and Wuss to a little fan fiction of the short story variety. That being the case, I deprived myself of the opportunity to check in with you guys a week ago. I suspect you weren’t too upset since…

Friends S4:E6 – Hard-ass had never faced such a perilous predicament. She had just returned home after a seemingly successful catering evert only to open up her email and click on a video from the customer, Dr. Shake, that revealed he had captured her catering partner, Wuss. Not only was Dr. Shake refusing to pay for the catering services rendered for his oldest daughter’s wedding but his video informed Hard-ass…